Cindy Jacobs Saw Jars of Oil Fill Up Before Her Very Eyes

Self-proclaimed prophet, Cindy Jacobs said that she has watched God fill up jars of oil, right before her eyes - a thinly veiled plagiarism to the Elisha story in the Old Testament.

We can know that Cindy Jacobs was telling a tall tale because, who in the hell, and everything worth anything, puts oil in jars anymore!!!!

She could have modernized it and said:

"I was sipping on Mountain Dew, and I watched the Lord keep that can full as if I had never sipped it.  AND HE KEPT IT ICE COLD!!!!!"

I would have fallen on my face and worshiped.

Why Does God Need Magical Incantations to Stay His Hand?

Cindy Jacobs is a self-proclaimed "prophet of God".  Watching her sermons and excerpts on talks she gives to the sheep that follow her will bring quite a number of hearty laughs to your lips, starting in the lower bowls, jiggling around your diaphragm, and finally bursting forth to thunder around the walls of the room - just like my grandmammy.

Here is a video of her talking, recently, about how she and a bunch of prayer warrior types saved the economy from imminent ruin, by fervently praying at Wall Street in 2008:

After listening to the two-minute self-worshiping piece, I got to thinking about the narcissistic nature of an all-powerful, supreme, all-knowing being, who would require teams of people to beg him to do something that he was going to do anyway - just because...hell, I don't know.

Why do people believe in an imaginary god that makes them humiliate themselves before him, believing that their pleadings could actually be ignored, thwarted, flung away like dung on a cow tail, or granted, even though NOT praying would have the exact same effect?

I'm glad I'm out.