Kristine and I have entered a very time-sensitive period in our lives. She has the stress of watching a houseful of six rambunctious kids, working almost 30 hours a week during the evenings, and taking a credit load of 20 credits this semester, with an eye toward graduating this May.
Her stress and my inability to make her happy is killing me. It's making me very sad, which makes me very internally reflective, considering why I am unable to singularly bring her happiness.
I have begun to realize that friends are very important in a person's life and one person can never be all another person needs. What I am good at makes Kristine love me very much and me her. But what she needs at certain points in her life are better given by others. Believe me...I try. And yet I fail.
It's like an employee within a team of employees. They provide a cog in the department wheel and provide it well. But ask them to help another part of the team with their current talents and they may fail miserably.
I'm that failure. And her other friends are victorious.
Good for them. I'm so happy that she has friends that care about her and don't give a damn about what her doctrinal beliefs are, something we never experienced while in Christian Fundamentalism.
Thank goodness we are out. Thank goodness I can look at life and figure things out without trying to rigidly shoehorn all my conclusions into some ancient and immovable holy text.
Life is stressful and good.
Her stress and my inability to make her happy is killing me. It's making me very sad, which makes me very internally reflective, considering why I am unable to singularly bring her happiness.
I have begun to realize that friends are very important in a person's life and one person can never be all another person needs. What I am good at makes Kristine love me very much and me her. But what she needs at certain points in her life are better given by others. Believe me...I try. And yet I fail.
It's like an employee within a team of employees. They provide a cog in the department wheel and provide it well. But ask them to help another part of the team with their current talents and they may fail miserably.
I'm that failure. And her other friends are victorious.
Good for them. I'm so happy that she has friends that care about her and don't give a damn about what her doctrinal beliefs are, something we never experienced while in Christian Fundamentalism.
Thank goodness we are out. Thank goodness I can look at life and figure things out without trying to rigidly shoehorn all my conclusions into some ancient and immovable holy text.
Life is stressful and good.
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