Wednesday, October 9, 2013

Today is Don't Kill Your Child Day

This day is about the story of Abraham, ole' Abe, as I like to call him.  A little voice in his head, or a booming voice in the sky, or a whisper on the wind (a still small voice like Elijah heard), told him to take Isaac up to some hill, slit his throat, and burn him so his god could smell the delicious smell of burning human flesh and...

Who knows why that god would do this.  The story is interpreted ad nauseum that this was a test of ole' Abe's faith, but, REALLY!?

If I were God (and maybe I am), I would have told the bloke to murder his kid and MY test would have been the expectation that he would take his long-nailed index finger, poke it in me eye, and loudly proclaim in King James English for me to "go f*ck myself".

If he didn't, I would have made sure that men knew women were in charge and then killed the gentleman on the spot.


Now don't kill your kids.  If your god tells you to, give him the finger.

In fact, this could be labeled Give God the Finger Day, but that's too controversial, so we'll just label it with the refusal to do what God tells us to do.  Less controversial that way.

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