Thursday, June 27, 2013

The Great Deceiver: A Perfect Set-up for Abuse - The Need for a Daddy

Read Part 3 - The Great Deceiver: Never Good Enough and Losing Heart

I physically left my Amish family's home at age 17. I married a man who grew up Amish and we became Mennonite. There came a time in our marriage where I felt I did not respect my husband. I asked him if he had committed adultery? He said no. I told  him that my problem with respect must just be in my past and I'm going to counseling to get some help. He let me believe it was all my fault and I started counseling with a special center that dealt with adults who felt like little children.

I had started to feel like a little girl after a tent revival in 1996 where I was triggered into bitterness I had towards my dad. It was my first experience with the living God. They prayed for me and  I felt like chains fell off of me and my eyes were opened and I could cry and I felt my heart. This led me to feeling like a little girl and all I wanted was a daddy. It was the strangest feeling I had ever had. I was 21 yrs old and I was consumed with this strange desire to sit on a daddy's lap.

The problem with this was not the desire, it was the people who used this desire to their advantage or used it to tell me I was crazy and if only I wanted to get over this desire I could. The problem was me. My family told me the problem was me, my community told me the problem was me, the church told me the problem was me.

Thus, I was set up to believe that it was my fault when counselors exploited my vulnerability.

Continue to Part 5 - The Great Deceiver: Enter Stage Right...Dr. Ken Copley

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