Thursday, November 14, 2013

I Despise the Word 'I'

See...the problem is, when I want to emphasize the fact that I do or did or am about to do or maybe once did, rather than someone else, or possibly wouldn't do or wouldn't have done, had I been in the same situation as them, him, her, or the whole lot of them, or nobody, for that matter, there is no good way to do it.

I mean, I could italicize it, like the first instance of the word 'could' in this sentence. But a slightly leaning 'I' is about as noticeable as a mistaken lowercase 'i' in a text message - which brings me to the real problem here - the fact that 'I' is already capitalized in the first place. 

Thus, if you write the word 'I' in the lowercase sense (i), even an elementary reader knows you either forgot to capitalize it, were too lazy to do so, have a crappy auto-correct app, or simply wanted to be an anarchist. 

But, in order to emphasize the 'I' by captializing it, you aren't really saying anything by capitalizing something that already should be capitalized in the first place. If you did, people would look at your writing and figure you really don't care about what you're talking about, or that you properly use the English language, are a conformist (and thus unnoticeable), or have a really good auto-correct app, allowing you to be as lazy as you so desire.

So, when I decide to emphasize the word 'I,' I have to get a bit creative.

And what of the apps that don't allow bold or italics words? You can't even begin to compose the above sentence and have to rely on really stupid things like this: *I*.

With the advent of emoticons, nobody can tell if I'm excitedly dancing with a pair of pom poms or am in a daze with a really long nose.

So I carry on. I guess I have to be boring old me. At least I don't worry that much about it.

See what I mean? What I mean? No you see what I mean???!

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